Turn-Off (girl on girl on girl on girl hate), Turn-On (toe on toe polish)

Kinda like wax on, wax off. Not really.

Evil first: this ridiculous and offensive review of the newest issue of PMS poemmemoirstory on NewPages.com, in which the reviewer can't get past the title of the journal because, I don't know, she's 10 or something. Evidence of our stunning progress as a society: "The allusion to menstruation is a turn-off for men. Many women who don’t already know the magazine don’t take it seriously. One potential reader contacted by this reviewer said she assumes the content has a 'whiny' tone, with poems like those found at a 'bad poetry slam.'" Whoever these people are, they need to get over their hangups about an acronym. This journal is consistently fantastic, diverse, and real. At AWP Atlanta a few years ago, the PMS reading brought the house down. The standing room only, had-to-open-up-the-adjacent-room house. I can assure you, Tanya, that plenty of people, male and female, take this journal quite seriously. The review goes on to actually cite and praise a few pieces from the issue, but always intro-ing that information with clauses like "To its credit" and "despite its problematic name," always a dig snuck in with a compliment as she glosses over these "excellent, serious, non-whiny literary works." (Try not to bang your head against your hard cover copy of Sexual Politics every time this reviewer uses the word "whiny.") I normally love the reviews section of NewPages, but come on. Can we all agree it's a reductive cliche at best to label work by women whiny until proven serious? Sweeping dismissal of talented female writers via the "women are icky" argument. P(M)S Tanya: you aren't invited to "girl talk" for a while.

Sorry, maybe I'm just on my rag or something. My big, bloody, crampy, bloaty rag. Nevermind, I'm not sorry. I want to Donita Sparks this review. No link because if you don't know what I'm referencing, you better ask somebody.

But there's hope. Jezebel is cracking my shit up today. Thanks to them and to Jon Stewart for making me laugh after the outpouring of asshattery from Faux News and other regressive POSs re: some hot pink toenail polish.